Caveat Lector

It is a measure of the degree to which my brain is unutterably fried that I find myself doing open-access data-curation filks. I’m so ashamed…

This one is almost performable. Find me a backup band and I’ll do it at a conference.

A DESULTORY E-SCHOLARSHIP PHILIPPIC
(with cringing abject apologies to Paul Simon)

I been Peter Subered, Stuart Shiebered.
I been Project Bamboo’d, D2C2’d.
I been EPrinted and DSpaced till I’m blind.
I signed author addenda, really scary,
There’s data curators in my library!
If the data ain’t peer-reviewed — well, never mind!

I been Caveat Lectored, resurrected.
I been Steve Harnaded, D. Scott Brandted.
Well, I paid all the tolls I want to pay.
So I marked up dust with Murray-Rust,
And ARROWs and DARTs won’t hit Les Carr,
SPARC trots out Cliff Lynch several times a day.

I knew a publisher, their work so small,
Weren’t cited by no one at all.
Not the same as PLoS.
They don’t open access. They’re so unhip that
When you say Alma, they think you’re talkin’ about Alma, Wisconsin…
…wherever that is.
PRISM ain’t got no culture,
But it’s all right, ma,
Everybody wants OA!

I been Steve Hitchcocked, been Leslie Johnston’d.
Jan Velterop, won’t you walk my dog?
Been golded and greened, been ETD’d,
Been PMH’d and ORE’d.
I just discovered somebody’s hacked my blog!

E-scholarship.
I just lost my cyberinfrastructure, Heather…